Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Joy and the stick

You don`t know Combat School. You don`t know what kind of an evil game it was. It was our 4th joystick in a month, I remember my mom`s eyes when I asked for the fifth...oh, the horror.

Combat School is actually an arcade game by Konami. The game can be played against the CPU or another player. Player one takes control of Nick, a green haired recruit in a green shirt. Well thanks to my father, our screen was a poor green screen, so no colors for that boy.  His rival`s name is more creative than Nick, he is Joe, another green haired dude with a green shirt. Joe was a little lighter green on the head though, so I assumed he was blonde in the real and colorful world. 

The game has 7 different training stages that you have to go through against your opponent. But the trick is here: if you fail at any level, you have to do push ups. I swear real push ups are easier than this thing, as you have to pummel your joystick right and left to do the moves to a level that 80s plastic engineering can not take anymore. The brutal move usually broke my joysticks at the neck, which makes the "stick" part detach and leave you with a blank "joy". 

Believe me when I say Amstrad never excelled in making joysticks. The two parts of your stick was attached thanks to this 2 mm cheap screw, which is ready to blast into new adventures rather than doing his job. 

Back to game: After all seven training courses are cleared, during which you`ll break your joystick anyways, the graduate (only the winner of the 7 challenges) will go to rescue the president from the terrorists. What a turn off. Your friend has to sit down and watch you play half of the game, because he could not shake his joystick fast enough...well, games have not developed into Fallout in one day.

In my case, Combat School shared the same disc (or disquette if you will) as Gryzor. So that was the golden item in my room. Throw all my clothes, pencils, posters if you want; but my friend, if you touch my golden disc, well we will have some problems.

Please take one last look at the craftily programmed graphics of that marvel. Nick is crossing the bridge while Joe is waiting for his turn, oh so anxiously. 

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